No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize