All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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