the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
