1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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