My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
