So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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