i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
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