I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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