how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
