so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
