We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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