it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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