the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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