youre lurking in front of me
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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