i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
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