you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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