you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize