let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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