Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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