Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize