I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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