I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize