Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
babies were throwing up all over the place
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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