"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
