You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
