Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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