we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
