dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
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