By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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