Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
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I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
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This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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