can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
