I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
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