Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Randomize
