My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
