Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
