..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
The best revenge is premature balding
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Randomize
