community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
