No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize