By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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