do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
