my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize