does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
