If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
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