I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
