Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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