So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
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