wat bout pragnant strippers??
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
