Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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