Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I AM VODKA MAN
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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