I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
